Relationship agreements are a tool used by non-monogamous couples to reduce some of the misunderstandings that can result from multiple partners. I think this approach could be incredibly useful for monogamous couples who want to deepen their understanding of each other`s sexual and emotional needs. The first step (which may be the most difficult) is communication. Monogamy is supposed for so many of us that we keep thinking about what it means in our relationship until something happens and we feel betrayed. Brainstorming a list of things that could create a sure experience of fidelity within the relationship could help avoid those oh moments and deepen your commitment as a couple. There is a growing debate about open and polyamorous relationships that are taking place right now. More and more people are exploring what it`s like to be treated romantically and/or sexually with multiple partners. One of the cornerstones of this type of relationship that helps keep partnerships on track is a document that sets out agreements on correct or non-correct behaviour. A relational agreement is a framework that helps define the parameters of openness to other relationships or experiences. It consists of points to be respected by two people during their relationship. For example, an open couple can only consent with partners outside of the primary relationship with safe sexual practices, or each partner must tell the other if they start a new sexual relationship with someone else. Nelson recommends that monogamy agreements be as clear as possible instead of considering that you and your partner are on the same side.
Basically, you should start a discussion about what monogamy means to you and record the results in a relationship contract. People have done monogamy in different ways forever. We don`t talk about it. Here are some pivotal questions that will help you think about the type of monogamy you prefer: what does it mean to be monogamous? Is monogamy only valid for sex, or does it also involve emotional intimacy? Does this mean that your only sexual outcome is your partner? Is sexting contrary to monogamy? Do you know what your partner thinks of these things? Have you ever talked about this? If you break certain parts of your relationship agreement, remember affectionately this particular agreement, then do your best to continue to respect it from this point. Ultimately, an agreement on monogamy aims to ensure that a relationship is respected for all parties involved. Look, communication can be sexy! Rowett tells us that a monogamy agreement should cover everything from personal values to broader topics such as how you share about your relationship with others (whether it`s your therapist or social media). Healthy relationships are based not only on what constitutes “fraud” but on everything that is in a partnership. The fact is that there is a lot to think about and discuss. Start with the writing: “This contract is concluded by and between (YOUR NAME) and (YOUR NAME PARTNER`S).